Wednesday, June 30, 2004

Embryo Graveyard

I think I'm having a hot flash from the Lupron. Of course it could be from eating that warm oatmeal, or it could be because its 104 outside (except that I'm inside in air conditioning), but I want to stand in front of a fan or open freezer for a few minutes.

I came out yesterday to my boss about IVF. It was really weird. I felt like an attention hoor, but really it was because I didn't want her to think I was flaking on the job. She wasn't surprised so I'm convinced Di told her already.

Last night Valerie and I shared some wine. I was complaining to her how they charge for freezing, storing and thawing of embryos, each as a separate charge. It just seems like nonsense since you wouldn't freeze and not store or freeze and not thaw, etc. Then I started talking about the destruction of embryos, and wondered if the office has a tiny embryo graveyard about the size of a pillow, with green grass and bonzai trees. For a few dollars more, they will not only bury your embryos, but you can purchase a tiny cross or monument to be put over their tiny grave, but maybe they're really just Monopoly or other game pieces. I think a tiny embryo graveyard sounds better than the thought of them throwing them away. Of course we signed for any unwanted leftovers (all will be wanted now, so this would be much later) to be donated to science. Kind of like tiny little stunt pilots, sacrificing their lives to finding new mediums or maybe discovering a cure for Parkinsons. Be brave little soldiers, you're fighting a good fight.

Of course this is all assuming we have lots of extra embryos. That's pretty much what I do all day, start dreaming, then slap myself into reality, then get a little sad, then try to cheer myself up, then back to reality... a rollercoaster of hope versus experience.

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