Thursday, March 17, 2005

Chunky Monkey

Regular OB appointment today. I'll keep it short because it's nothing you haven't heard before. The baby is breech, which wasn't a surprise to me since all my kicks are at 6:00 and there's a huge head-like bump at 12:00. And, she ordered an ultrasound (finally!) because I'm measuring ahead of dates (not for another week). Actually, I think I've been measuring ahead of dates for awhile, but her nurses always put down my number of weeks according to the 4/6 due date per LMP, and not my 4/12 due date per IVF. Even with that I've been ahead 1/2 week on size, but I think this week my doctor finally figured out that I'm really measuring 1 1/2 weeks ahead. So now I'm narrowing down his name to either Bubba or Chunky Monkey (after a very yummy ice cream).

On other news my father told me he may be taking over raising his two youngest kids. One is in high school and the other is in elementary school. His ex (#3) called and said that she wants to move out of state to get married. Since he doesn't want her to move the kids, she said he could have them. They're now negotiating the price of her house so that after his divorce from #4 he could buy it and move in instead of moving the kids.

Meanwhile, the kids have no idea. She hasn't told them anything. They haven't met the guy she's going to marry, much less told them that she will be marrying or that my Dad will be raising them. Nice, huh?

I don't get it. What happens that some parents just decide that they don't have to raise their kids? It happens all the time, especially with men, but women do it too. When my youngest sister was 15 my mother sent out-of-state to me to raise. My mother is now raising my oldest sister's high schooler, mainly because she gets in the way of my sister's social life. My father has left and rarely visited his kids every time he got divorced from their mother.

And I just don't get it. I can't imagine giving up Janie for anything or at any age. Maybe it's easier to say this since she's only 4, but I can't imagine my love for her changing or lessening as she ages. It's hard enough to send her to preschool or to a relative's for the weekend, much less just walking away to live my own life.

And this particular stepmonster (not a hit to all stepmothers but particular to her as this was one of the truly evil ones) surprises me because she really put herself out there as the perfect mother. She coslept with her son until he was at least 6, and bf him until almost 2. No daycare, no nanny, she wouldn't let anyone else watch him but her. And now, when he's only I think 9 years old, she's going to leave him to be with a guy?

Oh readers, why is the world so upside down?


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