Friday, September 02, 2005

Katrina

The news on Katrina is horrible. I feel like we've abandoned those people. I want to do anything I can to help.

At the same time, I'm trying to keep my husband from going down there. They're putting a crew together to send to the Gulf coast to help restore power. It's similar to when he went nearly a year ago to Florida for 3 weeks after that Hurricane. He would like to go. Now that I'm working part-time, the money would be good. He wants to help. And, his crew is going including his foreman. But I don't want him to go. It's not his safety that I worry about as I don't believe they would put him in a dangerous situation; the job is dangerous enough. Actually, it's me I worry about.

I need him right now. At the end of each day I start watching the clock hoping he's on his way. And at 6am, when Jack needs his bag emptied, a diaper change, and meds, I count on Matt taking care of him for just a few minutes. Then there's my Tuesday night class.

I know that if pressed I could find a way to work it all out without him. I just don't want to . Strongly don't want to. Desperately don't want to. So where I'd usually tell him to figure out what he wanted to do and then do it, instead I'm just flat out telling him that I'd rather he stay here. Still not the strongest words as I'm not an ultimatum type of gal. I'm just feeling kind of torn between my compassion for the people down there, and my own selfish needs. How about next year's disaster, when the baby is older and I'm getting more sleep and no longer in school?

I'm having a hard time watching the news. The suffering is immense. I see babies and children and I want to grab them and put them in my house. I feel guilty for taking a shower when they need drinking water. And look at all this food in my cupboard when they are so hungry. I don't blame the resuers, they are trying. But I'm developing an intense anger at the government. Hey, we knew this hurricane was coming for a few days. And it's now been what, 5 days since it struck?

I saw this woman on the Today show this morning. Two days ago she was on the news, holding her baby, calmly talking about how everyone was being so neighborly. Her blond hair was up and looked very neat. She looked like she was on her way to gymboree instead of outside a shelter. They showed her again today, wearing the same clothes, still holding her baby. Her hair is stringy and wet. Her eyes are crazed, words desperate, pleading for help, begging for water, saying she's having a hard time rousing her baby. And I'm sick about it. What the hell?

What would I do without water or food for my children? What wouldn't I do?

My baby had cereal this morning, and is currently sleeping in his swing. I wish her baby had the same.

I want to do anything for her.

But I'm trying not to send my husband.

F8ck.

30 Comments:

Anonymous Michelle said...

I understand how you feel. My fdh is planning on going down there. It's my birthday, and I've got a new 9 year old daughter. I have had a horrible two weeks. I want him home. I just feel awful even thinking that though. Those people need him much more than I do, I imagine.

12:11 PM  
Blogger Debbie1788 said...

My husband also works with the Power Company, Georgia Power, he is there. He left Wednesday Morning at 6:00 after coming home Tuesday night to tell me he was going.

My kids are older, DD is 19 and in college, she cried and cried when he called her to tell her he was going. She Said "Send someone else's Daddy!!"

DS is 14 and in Middle School, DH will miss his first Middle School Football Game next Wednesday.

We are coping, I feel guilty for missing him so much, I know how bad those people need him, its just that I need him too!

We will survive, it won't be easy, but it won't be forever either. I just know what a loving, caring, and generous man he is. He is doing what he needs to do. He knows that we are safe. We talk daily. We will be fine. I trust he will too.

I know it will be more difficult for you with the small kids. I hope everything works out for you!

7:22 AM  
Blogger Debbie1788 said...

My husband also works with the Power Company, Georgia Power, he is there. He left Wednesday Morning at 6:00 after coming home Tuesday night to tell me he was going.

My kids are older, DD is 19 and in college, she cried and cried when he called her to tell her he was going. She Said "Send someone else's Daddy!!"

DS is 14 and in Middle School, DH will miss his first Middle School Football Game next Wednesday.

We are coping, I feel guilty for missing him so much, I know how bad those people need him, its just that I need him too!

We will survive, it won't be easy, but it won't be forever either. I just know what a loving, caring, and generous man he is. He is doing what he needs to do. He knows that we are safe. We talk daily. We will be fine. I trust he will too.

I know it will be more difficult for you with the small kids. I hope everything works out for you!

7:22 AM  
Anonymous Kaybug517@hotmail.com said...

Any word yet Pazel? If he ends up in the Baton Rouge area, I can make sure he gets decent meals and stuff.

Kay

12:31 PM  
Blogger April said...

Oh Honey... that must be so hard.

You'll be in my thoughts. Let us know what happens.

9:06 AM  
Blogger Jen said...

Pazel, any news? I worry about you all...

7:18 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hope you are ok- been checking in for weeks for an update.

8:59 PM  
Blogger April said...

Also just curious about how you're doing.

Hope everything is o.k.

7:07 AM  
Anonymous Flargin said...

my sympathy. post to let us know how things turn out.

5:35 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Pazel, hope you're doing OK, haven't posted for a month. Wishing your family well.

4:26 PM  
Blogger Anna said...

I hope you and your family are well, and I hope your husband is home with you. Just wanted to let you know you're well thought of.

Be well.

4:40 PM  
Anonymous Jessica said...

Pazel, I am worried. You have not posted in forever on this site or on others. Please let us know you are okay.

5:00 AM  
Blogger Julie said...

Pazel, I miss you. I hope all is well.

7:43 PM  
Anonymous Menita said...

Thinking of you, hoping you are OK.

7:48 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

be checking for updates for weeks now! hope you all are ok. please update when you get a chance!
Lissi

6:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I just came across your blog about diet infertility and wanted to drop you a note telling you how impressed I was with the information you have posted here. I also have a web site about diet infertility so I know what I'm talking about when I say your site is top-notch! Keep up the great work, you are providing a great resource on the Internet here! If you get a chance, please stop by diet infertility

5:36 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Really wondering what's going on with you and your family........praying that all is well and hope you post soon.

12:12 PM  
Blogger Mony said...

Oh Pazel, where are you honey?
A word, a whisper..please.

3:49 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi, I've also been following your website for quite a while now and hope you and yours are ok.

1:58 PM  
Blogger Anna said...

Hey Pazel,

I hope you're alright. Just concerned that we haven't heard from you in a while. I hope all is well with Janie, Jack & Matt. Just wnated to let you know you're in my thoughts.

3:44 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Just hoping you're ok -- I check your blog all the time.

remcat

4:03 PM  
Blogger Blog World said...

Faith is spiritualized imagination.
Henry Ward Beecher- Posters.

12:20 PM  
Blogger Online Degree Adviser said...

Hello, Just wandering the blogosphere and here I am at your blog. I enjoy the style of how you have put it all together. I'll be coming back again.

Regards,

Hurricane Katrina in pictures

2:43 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Good design!
[url=http://mncgoaxs.com/yquy/mtqe.html]My homepage[/url] | [url=http://qflbtxdn.com/mhko/zprf.html]Cool site[/url]

10:43 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Great work!
My homepage | Please visit

10:43 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Great work!
http://mncgoaxs.com/yquy/mtqe.html | http://hkpoyxee.com/ochz/klhu.html

10:44 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

brainiacs dating site http://loveepicentre.com/testimonials.php skytv dating games 1990 s

8:28 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

supertopo ebook http://audiobookscollection.co.uk/fr/Statistical-Analysis-Methods/p228002/ ebook free greek philosophy [url=http://audiobookscollection.co.uk/Handbook-of-Real-Time-and-Embedded-Systems/p124111/]free templates for writing an ebook[/url] free ebook on microsoft expression web

12:15 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

[url=http://onlinemedistore.com/products/finpecia.htm][img]http://onlinemedistore.com/5.jpg[/img][/url]
communication in pharmacy http://onlinemedistore.com/products/propecia.htm doctor posts call script forum money direct find email pharmacy [url=http://onlinemedistore.com/products/zaditor.htm]wellness pharmacy alabama[/url]
india pharmacy regulations http://onlinemedistore.com/products/buspar.htm sue cvs pharmacy slip and fall [url=http://onlinemedistore.com/products/cialis-super-active-plus.htm]cialis super active plus[/url]
pharmacy continuing education and reviews http://onlinemedistore.com/products/strattera.htm pharmacy tech [url=http://onlinemedistore.com/products/lozol.htm]online mexico pharmacy ultram[/url]
herpes pharmacy http://onlinemedistore.com/catalogue/l.htm heb pharmacy prices [url=http://onlinemedistore.com/products/altace.htm]altace[/url]

5:46 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

ten commandments of dating [url=http://freeinternetdating.info/bride/russian-bride-pretty-bikini]russian bride pretty bikini[/url] 100 free lonely college coeds dating
my personal rules for dating essay http://freeinternetdating.info/romantic/romantic-canopy-netting-for-beds united kingdom dating and marriage culture
correct dating [url=http://freeinternetdating.info/meet/meet-and-fuck-racing]bbw speed dating[/url] dating sex survey

10:13 PM  

Post a Comment

<< Home